Oh how things change in the blink of an eye. For me positive changes have "evolved" and negative changes have come more in a quick "explosion" as opposed to something as time consuming as evolution. In truth, the bad stuff probably just seems more dramatic, and has always seemed to disrupt my hard earned security and thus I feel the need to use a term as dramatic as an explosion. This term afterall must truly convey the extreme impanct the change seemed to have on my life. I sit here though, at the start of another summer, and things, they are a changing, in what seems quick enough to use the term as explosive. This explosion has the potential to be a good one, possibly of firework nature, as opposed to the TNT explosions of my past. Summer for me will not be what I planed. More specifically summer has the potential to be very different from my initial pre-set ideas of what I wanted to do and where I wanted to go. Don't freek out, there will still be plenty of time for climbing trees, and playing at parks; rest assured. What could be different, (and this would be very different for me) is that I may in fact have a partner to climb trees with, to cottage with , to eat with and generally have fun with. At first glance this seems great (and it is). But it also complicates things to the extreme. I find myself looking at my work schedule and becomming quite frusterated wtih its life-owning capabilities. When my schedule was all that mattered, it was a great schedule. Working 7 days/nights in a row, and in return getting 4 days off seemed like an amazing deal. Sure a Friday night here and a Sat night there would have to be sacraficed, but who cares? Not me when "I" am my main priority, and time off is all that matters. I dont like going to bars THAT much that I always HAVE to go out. BUT NOW, that I have the chance at going out with somone who I really want to see and cannot because it just so happens to be the Friday I have to work, the schedule seems like a parent who refuses to let their teenaged kids out past 9:00 on weekends (bedtime). I now feel the need to stop my feet and yell back at the top of my lungs "THIS IS NOT FAIR, YOU JUST DONT WANT ME TO HAVE ANY FUN!!" I of course don't mind this frusteration, as the reason for it (having someone who I simile instantly just at the thought of seeing) is valuable enough for me to endure endless frusteration of this kind. I had just forgotten the struggles that accompanied two people with different schedules who want to at some date and time find themselves together. My first thought was to reduce my work load to one job, but that doesnt elievate the restrictive schedule at all, as my main (and not so easy to drop) job would be the job to stay. I just don't know. Change jobs? Keep jobs? last week I was planning drive-in movie trips with friends and time off getaways with anyone who was free. Now my only priority is ME being free. Either way my summer will be great. I just prefer the "great" that seemed to pop out of no-where, and that sets me for a summer that I have not already experienced ten times over. I hope things work out, I really do.