11:00 Confessions...

My mind is a mess today. Who am I kidding? My mind is a mess every day. Well, to be fair to myself, it's been a normal mind that was obblivious to anything negative until recently. I blame it on two things: night shifts that provide me with way too much time to think, and a lack of running due to the fact that it's winter and I refuse to use (ha ha that rhymes) a tredmill...

I write this blog in an attempt to release all of my frusterations, and to say all of the things that I can't say to others for fear of being judged or being discounted as crazy. I think this is a pretty sane thing to do. Everyone has things on their mind that they feel that they just can't talk about, or that seem silly to others, but are important to yourself. I am no different from anyone else. No one I know has the link to this site, and only one person (my best friend) even knows that I am entangled in the blogging world. I will never give anyone the link to this site. My last site was deleted for fear that a) someone was going to find it, and b) because I had a moment of weakness in which I considdered sending the link to the one person who can never see/read this. I am pretty sure that no one I know will ever put in the effort required to find this, and if for whatever reason someone I know does find this site, it will most likely be by accident. I find a lot of security in this fact. BUT if you do know me, and are reading this, just know that what I type is what is on my mind at this exact moment, and may very well seem much more dramatic than it actually is. Some (not all) of what I type about are my very raw insecurities, or most vulnerable topics. This is my way of dealing with things, its my way of releasing fears, anger, pain, and it's also my way of celibrating things that excite me, make me proud, and make me happy. People are naturally enclined to judge people based on their stories and confessions. There is a big problem with this when it comes to a blog. The problem is that these stories are fragments of a life, and cannot no matter how presice they are, make a person. This blog is not who I am. Just because you get to read my most inner thought doesnt mean you know me at all... And I mean that in the nicest way possible..